Monday,
the most terrible day
for all commuters.
After a crazy Sunday indulging in
clubbing, drinking, cheering...
watching soccer, betting on soccer,
scoring goals, not scoring goals, match fixing...
gambling on horses, throwing races, watching races,
winning, long shots upsetting favourites...
Wild sex...dragging, pulling, beating...
eating, drinking, pouring things down their throats...
swaying, shaking, singing, crying, laughing...
playing mahjong, winning mahjong!.
How can they not act like zombies
and walk with a limp...
when going to work.
My name is Tarzan.
I work for Mui Fah Yeow, a classic ointment company
The characteristics of this company are...
no profit, no morale, no future...
and worst of all
no chicks.
That's why all along, I've been bored,
Very bored, very bored, very bored...
Right, that's it
Get off
Be quick
Pal, you bored too?.
So am I.
Really?.
Can you help me?.
Hello!. Everybody!.
I'm Tarzan's brain.
At this point, I have to do some explanation for him.
Tarzan is suffering from intermittent...
360 degree express spiral...
irregular, hyper allergy
of the autonomic muscular spongy tissues.
And he will get aroused for no reason
He's been deadly bored, that's why...
Pervert!.
I'm Heidi.
I work for Mui Fah Yeow too.
I do take the bus for going to work.
It's damn boring in the bus.
Those sitting next to you are not real men.
Look at this one,
now look at that one.
So every day, I have been longing
for a real man to screw me...
Screw me, torture me and get me wet...
What?.!. Can't I dream?.
No...No...No...
Hi, my name is Rachel.
I'm here for the interview as Marketing Assistant.
Hello!. I'm the Marketing Manager here.
My name is Ben, you can call me Mr. Chow.
Ben Chow?.
So cute!.
Okay, can you tell me
why you applied for this post?.
Coz' my uncle told me that...
I should start working from the grass roots.
It can broaden my...
mind.
Is it funny.
Pretty funny...
That's why I chose to start at a less promising company
I see
Tell me why we should employ you?.
Coz' So Man Fung is my uncle.
He told me that my cleavage is nice.
Look.
yes
It's so sexy.
Well, if a customer tries to file a complaint
and your boss is on a business trip,
his secretary is crying coz her boyfriend just dumped her.
And even the toilet is stuck.
As a Marketing Assistant,
what would you do?.
I will take sick leave.
If you did, what would happen to the company?.
If a customer could file a complaint,
my boss could go for business trip,
his secretary could cry and
the toilet could be stuck,
then I should be entitled to take sick leave.
Well, let me tell you our rules.
In our company, we work from
Every Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
and Saturday
Starting from 9:.00 a.m. every morning
to around 6
7
8
9
1 0 o'clock at night
We don't have long or short weeks.
There would be no allowance,
no double-pay and no bonus.
And most importantly, our probation period is
1 year. After probation, you will be a contract staff for
3 months. Is that okay for you?.
OK
Welcome to Mui Fah Yeow!.
Thank you.
Alright, just find a place to sit down.
There are many work stations here, you can either sit
Here. Or...
Here...Or even
Sit here.
Okay, I will sit here.
Okay, it's done.
Thank you. You are so sweet.
I'm Ben Chow's conscience.
Ben has been working in Mui Fah Yeow for over 20 years.
He is mean, irresponsible...
He likes sexually harassing female colleagues
and kissing asses.
What are his shortcomings?.
So obvious.
Is he a good guy or not?.
I am his conscience, my colour is the best indication of his heart.
Big Auntie!.
Ben Chow, what is it?.
Ben Chow, you are so cute.
How many times do I have to tell you...
not to call me Ben Chow in the office.
I've called you that for so long now, I'm so used to it.
Remember, when you were small,
you used this for bathing.
My hubby used to help you to bathe and
play with your little dick.
So funny. Okay, that's enough.
Why is your breast bigger on this side?.
My hubby loves Chrissie's boobs.
So I had my breast enlarged last Saturday.
But I haven't got paid yet, so only half the job is completed.
I know we are a bit behind in pay roll this month.
Still you don't have to do this for revenge.
Give me a cup of coffee.
At this time of the day, my job is cleaning
I will do the pantry work at 1 2:00.
Don't mess up my schedule.
Or I will make your drink with toilet water.
And don't ever call me Big Auntie.
Call me Auntie Big
Do you understand, Ben Chow?.
Hard luck, I run into this fat woman every morning
Is it my karma to meet her?.
Damn it!. I bump into this chump every morning.
Is he tracking me?. Bastard!.
No way, they'll cut my pay for being late.
Gotta be faster than him
Present!. Present!.
You're late.
Heidi, Tarzan.
You should be familiar with our motto.
We have to keep our words and go to work on time.
Always keep value added.
And keep learning.
Now repeat it.
We have to keep our word and go to work on time.
Always keep value added.
And keep learning.
You guys are 1 minute late.
$1 00 will be deducted from your salary.
Hey!.
Hi!
Hey!. Your thing...
Mr. Chow...
He's sexually harassing me again.
Hello. Everybody!. Nice to meet you!.
I'm the new Marketing Assistant.
My name is Rachel.
Hi, I'm Tarzan.
Alright, you don't have to know them for now.
I will introduce you to others, okay?.
OK
Okay, well.
A, B, C, D, E, F!.
You don't have to know this lot.
Coz' they will disappear after coming into the office.
They will only show up again in the afternoon.
They are only here for me
to lay them off.
I see.
Okay, let me introduce.
This is Tarzan.
He's our Senior Marketing Sales Human Resources
Production and In-house Graphic Designer.
Nice to meet you!.
Hi!. Nice to meet you!.
Okay, Tarzan, get me a black copy.
Me?.
Well, the next one
is our Senior Accounting...
Administration Logistic Promotion and Customer Service, Heidi.
Hi Heidi!. Nice to meet you!.
Hi!
Alright, tell me Heidi's title.
$1 00 penalty for any mistake.
Okay, she's the...
is our Senior Accounting...
Administration Logistic Promotion and Customer Service, Heidi
Penalty?.
No, great.
Thank you!. You are so sweet!.
You are so cute!.
Auntie Big, come here.
She's been working in our company for many years.
Senior Cleaning Controller Door Security
and also our Tea-lady, AUNTIE BIG.
Ben Chow, your coffee.
Okay, get back to work.
Monday.
Really busy.
Monday feels like,
having routine sex with your wife.
Boring.
Hubby, you are back!.
It's Monday, let's have some fun.
Come on.
Well, my auntie told me that
her dog had a fight with grand-uncle's cat.
Harder.
Honey, our toilet bowl is stuck.
Can you fix it for me?.
I will come back to you after fixing it.
Tuesday
What does Tuesday feel like?.
It's damn boring.
I've been longing for Saturday.
It's like your own chick, no matter how long you've waited, she's still too young.
Prince, am I beautiful?.
I still have to wait quite a while until real happiness knocks on my door.
So beautiful.
Heidi baby, it's for you.
Go to hell.
I'm here to collect debt.
Your debt!.
Hey, Bro Dragon!.
What a coincidence, come on...have a seat...
You are really somebody, what would you like to drink?.
Iced lemon tea, less sugar, more ice.
Auntie Big, iced lemon tea, less sugar, more ice.
And a fruit salad too.
Where's your boss?.
When is he gonna pay the carriage fee?.
Sorry, my boss is in a meeting.
Meeting again?.
Do you think I'm a punk?.
I would get you and your boss to work as gigolo
and your chicks to be hookers.
When I get really crazy...
I would scare myself too.
Be careful...
Tarzan.
The Hello Kitty that my dad bought me is missing.
She's hot, rookie?.
Dwarf?.
Your ex-colleague?.
Shit you!. Shit you!. Shit you!.
You bastard!. Get lost!....
You looking for some beating?. Dare you mess around in my turf!.
You bastard!.
Go to hell!.
Shit!.
Excuse me, have you seen my Hello Kitty?.
The Hello Kitty that my dad bought me is missing.
Okay, I'll give you one more week.
I give this lady face, you have to clear your debt next week.
Where's my Hello Kitty?.
Rachel, you are so great.
It's your second day only, you are doing so great.
Boss will get you promoted for sure.
It's no use though.
I lost my Hello Kitty.
My dad bought me that.
Is it this one?.
Yes. Thank you!.
You are so sweet!.
Shit!.
Shit!. Shit!. Shit!.
Go to hell!....
Go to hell!. Bastard!.
I got to have lunch with my friend.
I'll be back at 4, okay?.
OK
Thank you!. Give you a kiss!.
Mr. Chow, I wanna sue Tarzan for sexual harassment.
He's been staring at my butt all day.
And he also got a hard on in front of me.
Really?.
I will handle this seriously.
Tell Tarzan to come here.
Hey, how did I sexually harass her?.
She said you got aroused in front of her.
Sir.
We are both men.
And I respect you the most.
Let me tell you something,
but you have to promise me not to tell anyone.
I'll keep my mouth shut.
Whenever you hear
a sharp note or scream,
your dick will get erected.
And the power of the erection...
would get my other body tissue erected.
It's not difficult to cure this uncontrolled erection.
The problem is, it does not erect when you want it to,
that is hard to cure.
Ah?.
He said it's incurable.
It seems that we are getting farther away from each other.
I don't know whether it's an excuse or not.
Sometimes, it will get aroused without any reason and I think it wants sex.
But it gets soften at the crucial moments.
And it will never get up again, how can I live with this?.
It's like that every time
If you don't believe me, I have a doctor's certificate to prove it.
As a man, I do understand.
I do sympathize with you very much.
Okay, you go.
Tell Heidi to come here.
You're cool.
Wednesday, the only thing that would excite me
is that Fai will deliver distilled water to us.
Fai.
Miss So, water delivery.
Let me fetch you a cup of water.
Miss So, water delivery.
It's Fai again.
You're sweating, let me give you some tissue paper away.
Sorry, I'm so filthy.
Fai, please put it in.
What do you mean?.
The water.
I always wanna do it myself but I just can't.
As you are here today, please do it for me.
No problem. Let me teach you.
First you should have a firm stance.
Then you lift the bottle
and aim this head
at that hole
then put it in.
Do you want me to do it
or you do it yourself?.
Let's do it together.
Rachel
My pen is running out of ink.
Have you got another pen with a lot of ink?.
No. I just have folders.
File folders?.
File folders.
Oh, that's good.
Let's see
if this pen
works in your folder.
You are so naughty.
I have to save my folder for Mr. Chow.
Oh!. I forgot to give him.
I gotta go.
I wanna try too.
I have hurt my back.
You'd better see a doctor.
No need. Just a stretch will do.
A stretch?.
Really?. Our company got taken over?.
What should we do if you ran away?.
I don't know Putonghua. I can't speak it properly.
He's coming tomorrow.
Are we gonna be fired altogether?.
Stop!.
Bad news!.
I just overheard Mr. Chow said
our company got taken over by a mainland company.
Their CEO will be here tomorrow
and he's gonna fire us.
We should get back to the office at 9:00 am sharp.
And we should master Putonghua asap.
Every one of us?.
Miss Fang. Fang Pink Pink
Hello, Miss Fang.
Hello.
I'm Ben Chow.
Ben Chow.
Ben Chow, Zhao...
Ben Chow.
I know you do.
And I'm happy that you do.
Gao, gold...
"Gold" xing.
And I'm happy that you do.
You can help me to suck...
Suck...
You can help me...
to settle
all the problems.
Fang Pink Pink is a man.
It's not appropriate for Miss Fang to deal with such minor matters.
I'm Dickson, the new Manager of HR department.
Is Mr. Chow here?.
Yes...
That's me...
Stop speaking your broken Mandarin.
Just speak Cantonese.
Mr. Chow. I'd like to meet the rest of the staff.
No problem.
This way, please.
Hi, everybody.
You guys should know
your boss already sold Mui Fah Yeow to
our China Adult Healthcare group.
It will set up a branch office in HK.
A new arrangement for the staff and markets
will be in effect next week.
New arrangement, that's laying off.
A 6-bullet-pistol with 5 bullets in.
See who is the lucky one
to survive through this.
See you at 9:00 a.m. next week at the new office.
Come on, don't be so quiet. Let's drink up.
Being your boss for so long, it's just my first time to treat you drinks.
Let's go all out tonight!.
and have some real fun!.
Our boss just dumped us like this.
Why are you crying?. Have you ever seen our boss before?.
We got taken over by the mainlanders. It's doomed this time.
It's okay to get paid in RMB.
Listen.
There will be a massacre on Monday.
I just got here - just in time to witness this massacre!.
Don't be silly. Don't panic.
We do have our advantages. We are well established here.
And those mainlanders have to rely on us.
Yeah, but not on you.
You have nothing to do with the "advantages".
Who do you think you have?. You are old and boobless.
Ya right - you are nobody to them.
Stop that.
Remember. We are in the same boat now.
We have to fight against our intruders. Screw them!.
I'm not happy about this.
Rachael, cheer up.
For those bad days,
it's already included in our salary
You shut up!. You shut up!.
You are to be blamed.
We had to do everything for him. And he kept deducting our wages.
He always talks about added value
and keep learning.
What have we learnt now?.
That we're being fired.
You are good
for nothing.
Ha ha...he's drunk.
He's really drunk.
We are in the same boat though.
And we have to fight against our intruders.
Chief. We are in the same boat.
And we have to fight against our intruders.
Right. Come on.
We are in the same boat.
And we have...
to fight against our enemy!.
Wow, is it necessary?.
Mainlanders are so dramatic!.
Let's wait and see.
Sorry.
It's so nice here. Uncle Dick, you'd have called me
Hey. Shh...come here.
Remember, it's just a bait. Don't be deceived.
And we have to remember that
we are in the same boat. And we have to fight...
What the hell!. It's all gone!.
I will back you up.
It's comfy, have a try.
Dammit!.
It's really comfy.
Hi.
This is our new product, vibrating underwear.
The control is here.
Just switch it on, you will find the source of your happiness.
Really?.
Flora, come here.
Please check it out.
Try it.
No way, I don't want it.
Don't be like this. You might find something you like over there.
Try Me Try Me
Try Me Try Me, I will bring you the ultimate joy.
I'm Pink Pink
Hi, everybody.
Welcome to our China Adult Healthcare group.
This is our new office
I have both good news and bad news to announce.
Follow me.
It's gone.
Where's the vibrating underwear?.
What's up?.
Only the remote control is left behind.
The vibrating underwear is missing.
No, it will vibrate when the remote control turns on.
Everybody, satisfied with the new office?.
I am satisfied.
Mr. Chow.
Let's go on.
These are our staff of the new department.
Hello!. You can call me Dick...
Son
Dickson
Human Resources Manager
As a HR manager,
I definitely got the strongest stamina.
I hope I can have big achievement
with my staff.
I was born in the year of chicken. I'm in the nature of "water".
I'm a passionate Sagittarius.
Breasty
Production & QC Manager
No matter what you are,
and no matter if I'm riding you or you are riding me,
I will try my best to get you satisfied.
You can call me Yin.
You can call me Virgina.
Virgina
Senior Marketing Executive
I know well what men need
in the market.
No matter what you need,
you can come
to my room.
Mr. Chow, you all have a funny look.
Do you have something to say?.
Your company mainly produces adult products
but our company
mainly produces medical ointments.
Why would you want to buy our company?.
Please speak in Cantonese. We can all understand.
But I don't understand what you said just now.
You'd better say it again in Cantonese.
Your company mainly produces adult products
but our company mainly produces medical ointment.
Why would you want to buy our company?.
Can I interpret your words as...
you don't think that our company is proper?.
If you are such a gentleman,
why do you keep staring at my tits?.
Oh Yes!. Yes!.
Great!. Great...
Very good.
My father is an old friend of your boss'.
Knowing that your company is going bankrupt,
we are doing you a favor to retain
your company's reputation.
In fact, we are going to transfer you guys to a new department.
Aphrodisiac aromatic oil department.
These people se next to me are your superiors.
Superiors.
What do you mean?.
They are your superiors and you are their subordinates.
Don't you get it?.
I just said I have both good news and
bad news to announce.
The good news is starting from now,
your salary will be raised by 50%.
And the bad news is
there will be lay off.
I knew it. There will be lay off.
Everyone can name a person for me.
Since there's none,
I'm gonna tell you our rules.
Anyone that has no real accomplishments or
is always fooling around in the office
will be laid off
We are gonna give you a new project to handle.
We will give appraisal for each staff
during the project. Then we will have a final decision.
I have made a prediction for Mui Fah Yeow.
In the coming year,
it will be advantageous for the development of Mui Fah Yeow.
So we already decided to have a joint venture
with Curry Magic oil, the best seller in the market,
in developing of a new aphrodisiac aromatic oil.
It's a kind of aromatic oil that can refresh and enhance sex drive.
Well, I'm gonna let Mr. Chow handle this project.
No problem, just call me Ben.
That's okay, Pink Pink
I'm Miss Fang.
Any suggestions?.
Yes. I have a question.
Go ahead.
Are we gonna have 30% off
in buying those products?.
Of course.
I hope in the future,
our staff will be as excited and aggressive
as Heidi, and will give me some outstanding performance.
I'll give you a month
to finish this project.
You guys can go back.
Go back.
Aren't we working here?.
Of course not.
This Saturday,
we will have our annual party
in sampling the suntan oil.
Everyone is welcome to have fun.
Wow, muscle!.
Muscle!.
What the hell!. We have to do the business fair on Saturday.
What the hell!.
Why didn't you tell me earlier?.
You look so outdated. And you didn't bring your swimsuit.
You guys are here.
Go and get changed.
We didn't bring our swimsuits.
Dickson, it's okay.
It's okay. I have prepared plenty of that.
Choose whatever you want!.
Get moving.
Come on...
Hey!.
Is it necessary?. You put on so many.
It's pretty rough in here. Better be careful.
Got it.
Come on. Nothing I haven't seen before!.
Wow!.
Wow, muscle!.
Hey, I go surfing.
Ben Chow, I'm going.
Ha, your name is Ben Chow?.
Hi
Do I look good?.
There is Hello Kitty.
Pretty...very pretty.
Thank You What's up?.
Don't look at it.
Tarzan, why didn't you pay me a compliment?.
Do I look good?.
Come on. One each. Go serve the customers.
What kind of service?.
Put the oil on the customers.
Okay, let me help you first.
Wait. You should serve your clients first.
You can help me with it later.
One each. Give them to your staff.
Okay.
Okay. Move it...
Move it.
Hey pretties, anyone need help with the oil?.
I do. Thank you.
Sorry, someone is calling me.
Ben Chow, don't go away.
How do you know I am Ben Chow?.
Ben Chow!.
Stop looking around
Come and help this young man put the oil on.
Soft Drink?.
Thank you.
Muscle!.
Let me shoot.
Shoot...
Let me...
I don't want you.
Everybody, the ceremony has now begun.
Everybody please come to the stage front.
The annual innovation award goes to
those who develop
this exotic suntan oil.
Thank you.
Congratulations.
The next award will be presented by HR department.
2 months salary will be given to four of our staff.
2 months salary.
The winner is our newly joined staff,
Chan Tai Keung,
Chu Chi Tung, Lau Tin Fat
And the last one is
Auntie Big.
What?.
Me!.
What the hell!. They should give me a diligence award.
Ben Chow!. I made it.
Thank you.
Do you know why you won this award?.
Maybe it's because I'm still pretty at my age.
As you got here, you did nothing
but busy courting girls and guys.
We don't need such staff in our company.
So, we are giving you one month's extra salary.
You don't have to come to work tomorrow.
What do I do now?.
Everybody. As a CEO,
I hope everyone would dedicate yourself
to the company every minute.
Your work will be appreciated.
And we know your shortcomings too.
Let me remind you,
Iook out for yourself and do your best.
Ben Chow. I'm doomed.
That's okay.
Now you have the money for your other boob.
Auntie Big.
I will take the mushroom home to make soup.
You think it's funny?.
I just want to cheer everyone up.
Those mainlanders are so cunning.
You fix them today, it'll be our turn next time.
It's time to find another job.
We'd better work on that Aphrodisiac aromatic oil.
No need.
I already got
a great plan for that.
My plan is
to court them all.
Shit!.
Good, that's right. After we screwed them,
we then dump them.
Don't be so childish.
This is not childish.
I'm talking about politics.
I'm using politics now.
Sex politics
Sex politics.
I'm gonna use sex to toy with them.
They will surrender to my despotic power.
Then we will turn defeat into victory.
And you guys will get the girls and the money.
Where should this snapshot insert.
Breasty is scared of ghost.
Target: Breasty
Result: Superstitious
Virgina likes to play this game.
Target: Virgina
Result: Loves SM
What's up?.
Well, I'm here to look at your artistic piece.
You love photography too?.
Yes. I used to be the champion of a photography competition.
Did you find Curry King, the CEO of Curry Magic oil?.
Ah...
Curry King.
It's okay. I will find him soon.
I know he's been living in seclusion. It's hard to find him.
It'd be tough for you.
Not at all.
Pink Pink likes photograph.
Success.
Dickson.
You are so open when you poopoo.
Let me close the door for you.
No.
I have claustrophobia.
Don't close the door.
I got it.
He is suffered from claustrophobia.
Raid into action!.
Play rape with her.
Hey, what's up?.
Go away!.
Let me go...
Help!....
Ha, don't ask me where I came from.
No... please...let me go...
Who are you?.
Who am I?.
It's you.
Okay?.
Well!.
Tarzan, it's all counting on you this time.
You should practice a little bit.
Ferocious look.
horrifying look.
Not a human face.
Okay, keep your voice down.
Okay, ready.
Why you look like this?.
You too, it's alright.
No, please...
Help...
Why is there one more?.
Is he one of us?.
No way.
1, 2, 3, 4
They're all here.
He's really a rapist.
Hey, call the police.
Hey, no.
Come out, otherwise someone will cut in before you.
Help, let me go.
No...
What's going on?.
Go away!.
Over here...
Who are you?.
I will call the police then.
What's up?.
Mission failed.
Raid into action 2
Play ghost with her
Go.
Go...
Stop!.
What are you doing here so late in the night?.
Meeting.
OT.
Leaving.
Did you see anything?.
I saw you.
I probably saw a woman in red.
You bump into a ghost though.
That would be great.
Okay, if there's really a ghost here.
I would summon him to confront me now.
I would summon him to possess me
You talk to them.
So scary.
If anything happens,
use chopsticks to hold my middle finger and drive him out.
Understand?.
Yes.
She's serious.
It's not gonna work if it goes on like this.
Well, have you got any ideas?.
I'm so scared.
We'd better take action first.
Don't let him go. We should go for it.
Who will go then?.
You!.
Does it really work?.
I've taken him now
Scared?.
So scared.
Don't be afraid, Rachel. I will protect you.
You. Why did you possess him but not me?.
Possess me.
No, your stamina is too strong,
Ghost can't possess you.
Yeah.
I want to see my mom. Ask my mom to come here.
Your mom.
Mom... Mom...
Mom.
Daughter.
It's you, mom.
Of course I am your mom
Mom, I miss you so much.
Honey,
you are so pretty.
You should find a guy to take care of you.
Is there anyone around?.
Just find any guy.
Yeah, don't let your mom worry about you.
Just pick any guy.
That's right. Maybe you should pick me or him.
Didn't you get possessed?.
I shifted to this one
so that I could drink.
Honey, hurry up. Hurry up.
Go.
You should promise me quickly.
Hurry up. Just pick one.
Pick one. Yes...it's almost time.
Yeah. You better pick one.
Be brave. And pick one.
Just pick one.
Rachel, be my girlfriend.
Mom, in fact I didn't dare tell you.
Rachel, when I first saw you,
I was deeply attracted to you.
Although I have a woman's body,
I do have a man's heart.
Rachel, I love you.
Mission failed
Raid into action 3
Accompany her to take photos.
Everyone is here.
Did you bring your camera with you?.
Yes.
You did. Good!.
Everything is ready.
There are fruits too.
Alright, let me do the roll call.
Is Fang Pink Pink here?.
Ben
What a coincidence!.
Yeah.
Never thought that I would see you here.
Yeah.
Yeah, I almost forgot you love photography too.
That's great, my friend, Mr. Cheung
he's not feeling well today. So I came here to take is place.
Oh, yeah.
Wait, Ben. Let me help you.
Have a seat.
Okay.
Everybody.
This week is the practical course in human body photography.
Mr. Cheung can't come today.
And we have invited Ben Chow to be his substitute
Let's begin.
Let's begin?.
Take off your clothes.
Take off my clothes?.
Mr. Cheung is our model.
You come to substitute him today, surely you have to do the same
Ben, move your book.
Move the book, move the book...
Ben
Move the book, move the book...
Wow, where are you?.
Cellulite!.
Just too small.
Is this your first time?.
That's okay.
After a few times,
you will get used to it
Maybe you would even enjoy it.
Good job.
Mission failed.
Raid into action 4. Get trapped in the lift with him.
Oh Handsome boy!.
What a coincidence!..
What a coincidence, baby.
Are you okay?.
It's okay.
Why are you breathing so heavily?.
It's okay. Your hand is so cold.
Let me give you warmth.
You are sweating
No... stop it...
Are you alright?.
Don't be afraid, come on, I'll give you a hug.
Are you alright?.
Stop it!. Go away!.
Hey...
I'm here. Hug me!.
Yes. Higher. Higher...
Lower.
A bit higher.
Higher, lower.
Shit!. Right, higher.
A bit higher, right.
I want...
I want you to kneel down.
I know I am so charming.
Okay, just for you.
I wanna leave, help!.
Hey!.
I wanna leave, help!. What's wrong with you?.
Hey!.
Get up.
Mission failed.
Mr. Chow. How is the joint project with Curry King going?.
Miss Fang. About the information that
we gathered on Curry King.
It's almost completed.
???????????
What did she say?. I cannot understand a word.
She asked whether this is all the information we found.
You are so good!. You even understand this?.
He can read lips.
Miss Fang, they are taking pictures of our findings.
I think no one
is listening to me.
Those who have no value to the company should leave.
Sorry, Miss Fang.
Please give us a chance.
We will find Curry King to get the project done.
Miss Fang, maybe you should give them a chance.
Willing to admit your mistake is a kind of improvement though.
I can give you one more chance.
Just once.
You have to get your job done in a week.
???????????????
This time I can understand.
They said Saturday and Sunday would be excluded, so we only have 5 days left.
Good.
Go to the main page.
Here're lots of oil, give me all...
which ones are magic oil?.
Please... We...
want... All...
Magic oil.
I want that.
Give it to me,
hurry.
Magic oil...magic oil...
You are so horny, young man.
Do you need me to put it on for you?.
Excuse me. We want to buy the most powerful love oil.
Yes, for chicken or for duck?.
What's the difference?.
This taste is for chicken
and this is for duck.
For personal use only.
No problem. Good for home or travel. Not bad for a present either.
Everyone should have one at home.
Cut the crap. Just give it to me.
Soy sauce?.
Pal, stop messing with me.
We are gonna rub it on.
I didn't lie to you. If you use it on chicken, it will bring out the chicken taste.
If you use it on duck, it will bring out the duck taste.
Yummy House
Who brought us here?.
Now, we only have a way...
to turn defeat into victory.
We have to find Curry King.
And persuade him to join our project.
But they said Curry King is hard to deal with.
Don't worry.
Mr. Curry King.
We are from China Adult Healthcare group.
We would like to talk about our joint project.
Welcome.
And you are
Ben Chow.
You know me?.
Everybody knows you are Ben Chow, the lady-charmer.
Adult Healthcare group offered you 1 0 times your salary to recruit you
And you are the most handsome guy in your field.
Thank you.
Today is your birthday. We have got a birthday cake for you.
My birthday?.
Make a wish.
Rubbish. You got fooled by me.
Are you dumb?.
You want me to join your project?. Who do you think you are?.
Let me tell you. Today we came here
with all sincerity
Our Curry Magic oil is beneficial to all impotent men.
And all couples could enjoy the pleasure of sex.
Viagra can only help those impotent men to be potent.
But we are helping the weak guys to be strong, the strong to be stronger.
And the stronger to be strongest.
We are the best seller in the world.
You want me to join your project?. Dream on!.
We want to develop an aphrodisiac aromatic oil.
Both men and women can use it.
A woman would enjoy sex if the man is virile
Ignorant.
Whether a woman enjoys sex or not, depends on the atmosphere.
Do you know that?. Even if a man's penis is only half an inch
or can only keep it up for one and a half minutes,
if the woman feels good about the whole thing, she could still enjoy having sex with him.
Besides, only men would buy your Curry Magic oil.
It's Curry Mui Fah Aromatic Oil both men and women would buy it.
She is qualified to say that.
You better go home and rest, auntie.
What will want you?.
You are the poor ugly duckling that nobody wants.
Who said that?. I'm her boyfriend.
Right, honey?.
Are you the "little" guy who's only half an inch
in length and one and a half minutes long?.
Hey!.
We are here to talk about our joint project
not to be insulted by you.
Sorry.
I'm not interested at all, to talk business with you people
Just go home.
What the hell!. You little shit!.
I'm gonna
beat you up.
Wanna fight.
Of course, do you know
When I'm in a fighting mode, my face is very vicious...
I'm so scared even thinking of it.
I think my neighbors would be scared instead.
Hi...
See you next time, bye.
Bye!.
Help!. Where are my limbs?.
My face is so painful.
Who is grabbing my mouth?.
Shut up.
I'm facing a big problem now.
There's a butt in front of me.
I can see the cleavage clearly.
Whose is this?.
Any characteristics?.
Fat.
And hairy.
Is it...
You will know if you hit it.
Are you sure?.
I don't know where my hand is.
I got it. There's a nail ahead.
Let's roll over to it. Whoever screams is the one!.
No, I'm afraid that would be me.
Maybe let's take turn to fart,
Then we will know whose butt it is.
Don't!. All the disadvantages are on me.
It's blowing up!.
Yes, but we don't know whose it is.
That's easy.
Who's painful?.
Not me.
Not me either.
I feel nothing.
It's me!.
Does it hurts?.
God damn Curry King, you will pay for this.
What the hell!. Curry King doesn't want to work with us,
Let's steal his nostrum.
And we could make our own aromatic oil.
Aren't all the ingredients listed on Curry Magic oil?.
but we don't have the proportions.
Just give it a guess, it's okay.
The oil is ready. Who wants to try?.
Heidi Baby, let's try this oil, okay?.
No.
I just like you the way you are.
Everyone come here.
Yeah
Yeah...
Come on!.
Yeah
Yeah!.
Look.
Go away.
The sun is rising.
Better off without it.
Let's steal the real nostrum.
Sure. We only have 2 days left.
We have no choice.
Where should we look?.
It must be in his study.
It's like that in movies.
Should we go together?.
No, Tarzan and I will go.
You guys stand sentinel.
OK
It's boring being the sentinel.
I should have brought my iPad with me.
Should we play mahjong with you then?.
No need.
Old chump.
Eating is what you do best, you screw up everything!.
Son, no matter what, I'm still your father.
You are where you are because I invented the Curry Magic oil
You are so harsh to me. You wouldn't even feed me well.
Where is your heart?.
I told you not to mention that anymore
Dare you say that again.
Bastard!. Don't hit me.
Curry King is so bad. He even hit his father.
He went inside. Let's tell them.
His father is trying to kill himself. Let's save him, hurry.
I don't wanna live, I wanna die.
No, uncle.
Don't die...
Your son is so bad to you, you should leave him
No matter what, he's still my son.
You...
Wait, did you invent Curry Magic oil?.
Yes.
You should know the ingredients. Can you help us out?.
Where's the study?.
Over there.
Action!.
Hey...
What?.
This painting is worth over 1 0 million.
Of course, this painting is so famous.
Bull shit!. This is a Western painting
It's about the birth of Christ in the manger.
Bull shit!. It's not a horse. It's a donkey.
Idiot!. It's a mule. It's a donkey
Mule?.
It's a donkey!.
Mule!.
Who are they?.
Celebrities.
Celebrities?. Which celebrities?.
This is Andy Lau and the other is Louis Koo.
Insane.
Sweetheart, I'm back.
Honey!.
Who poke my butt?.
Rock paper, scissors... Scissor
Excuse me.
What are you doing?.
Crouch down. What are you doing?.
Shut up!.
I told you to stand sentinel. Where did you go?.
We were er...
We were here all this time. Yeah.
Well, Curry Magic oil was
invented by Curry King's father.
His father said he's being mistreated by his son.
He's going to give him a lesson.
And he sold us the nostrum for $3,000.
Yeah.
It's done then.
Yeah!.
It better work this time.
Sure. It will work.
Grandma, I won't sleep with hookers anymore. I won't.
Yesterday midnight, an 1 8-year-old man got burnt on his testicles
after putting some unknown substance on them.
He's been admitted to hospital.
The police has kept a close eye on this case.
and handed it over to Organized Crime & Triad Bureau.
Boss, let's give up.
Dad, you are awesome.
Those idiots got fooled by us.
I don't think they would bug us anymore.
Son, how's my acting?.
You are better than Tony Leung. You are the best Indian actor.
Impossible.
Where's the problem?.
Yeah. We got the nostrum.
What's wrong?.
Is it possible that this oil cannot be used on hookers?.
Should it be used on gigolos instead?.
I'm just kidding.
I got it. Our herbs might be the problem.
Herbs.
Come with me.
Okay!.
Mom, and dad. My colleagues are here to get some herbs.
Your colleagues.
Didn't you say your colleagues are all bastard?.
Mom.
She didn't say that. It'd be her boss instead.
I mean my former colleagues. My colleagues are so nice.
Go get the herbs. Go get the herbs.
Uncle. In fact, we did buy some before.
But they didn't work very well.
Let me see.
Seal's penis, buffalo's penis, lamb's penis, deer's penis.
Those animals like having plaits?.
Yeah, they love that so much.
Blocking stone, cynomorium songaricum, tortoise neck.
Your impotence is so severe?.
Hubby.
You don't have to be so embarrassed. We are very open.
Is that you or him?.
It must be him.
Young man. You came to the right place.
Let me add one more herb to the list.
It would work for sure.
What's that?.
Her Epimedii.
Her Epimedii?.
There are even stronger medications too.
A pair of mandarin ducks.
And a pair of old geckoes.
They will turn an impotent into a macho man, and the frigid into sexy.
The awesome Curry Mui Fah aromatic oil you can do it 9 times a night, no problem.
It's gonna work this time.
You don't have to drink it or rub it on.
You just have to inhale it. Then you can screw your head off.
So powerful?. Who will try it?.
Give face to Heidi.
No client is willing to try your oil.
They scare that they would become impotent.
What should we do?.
I have to use my secret weapon.
He is impotent anyway.
If it works on him, you are gonna make it this time.
Who is that?.
My...
father.
I'm so virile.
Ladies, come and help.
Master is so powerful today.
Dad, what's wrong with you?.
Son, their aromatic oil is selling so hot.
No one would buy our Curry magic oil.
Dad, I will have my revenge.
How?.
Dad, did you forget
we invented the Slut Smoke?.
Once you smell it, you will keep making love no matter it's man or woman.
It's been banned in the States.
Yeah.
I know they are going to have a celebration party tomorrow.
Let's sneak in and we would leave after leaving the Smoke.
And their celebration party would turn into a sex orgy.
You are wonderful, son.
Cheers!.
Congratulations.
Congratulations on your victory.
Come on, cheers.
Cheers!.
Soda.
Heidi.
Hey.
In fact we have been through so many things lately.
We have been through life and death.
What are you talking about?.
It means we used to be colleagues and now
we are moving to a higher level.
Do you get it?.
I have no idea.
Well, you are in the light and I am in the dark.
That's why I used to draw your attention by arguing with you.
If you still won't say it, I am gonna leave.
I love you.
What do you think?.
I've been drinking too much.
I think I'm gonna be sick.
I'm serious.
It's our honor to have 2 experts in our party today.
They are sex expert, Doctor Ng,
and Human Reproductive expert, Doctor Suen.
Thanks for coming.
We are also happy that they both brought
some elaborate instruments with them.
This instrument would show
the physical and psychological responses
after rubbing the aromatic oil.
The test is now begun.
Terrorists.
Pervert.
What's that?.
Slut Smoke.
Run!. Hurry!.
Why, is it a bad thing?.
Take a hike!.
Little Bee...
Little Bee!.
Little Bee...
Curry King, stop there!.
So what?.
Stop!.
Ben Chow...
Ben Chow, wait for me.
Get lost...
Heidi?.
Tarzan!.
In fact, you are the one
I have been worrying the most.
My piggy...
I used to get aroused when somebody screams.
But now...
It's so powerful.
I like it...
You know, when I first saw you
I already wanted to do you.
Beware, all units!.
This is the cerebral control.
Our little Ben Chow finally found his target.
The heart unit should quickly
pump blood to the testes.
Pump more blood to the testes.
Good job!.
The penis should
get turgid with full power.
Beware, all units.
We should do a good job for our boss.
Tell the sperm buddies
to hold a bit longer and delay the ejaculation.
They were being so impatient last time,
and sacrificed themselves in the underwear.
Remember, we are about to go.
Wait, some of my buddies are not back yet.
What?. Where are they?.
Sorry, I got lost.
Where is this place?.
I'm the boss' nostril hair.
You are being pumped up here again.
This is the nostril. Stay on one side.
I will let you jump out at the right place
What is it?.
Shit!. I am so scared.
Why?.
People used to wear condoms now. I don't want to die in a condom.
It's not worth it.
Our boss used to masturbate all the time.
And we die crashing into the wall.
So it's better to crash into a condom.
Didn't you hear that before?.
Go.
It's about time, let's go.
When would the sperms arrive?.
So nervous.
Beware, all units!. We have got into an emergency state.
Penis buddies,
Let's get turgid with full power.
Why are you coming back?.
Why do you smell so bad?.
It's faeces.
Ben Chow betrayed us.
Why is it you?.
I never thought having sex with a man can be so much better than with a woman.
Really?.!.
Come on, let's do it again.
Be good, come on... No...
No...
What are you doing?. Dreaming again.
I would poke your butt.
What are you doing?.
It's for your own good.
If the tigress comes in and sees you sleeping again,
she will give you a warning letter.
Let me ask you. Do you know why there's leap year every 4 years?.
Olympic happens once every 4 years.
World cup happens once every 4 years.
Yeah, you are blocking the way. Beat it!.
Have you been working late again?.
For you.
So nice?. Is it poisoned?.
Yeah, it's poisoned. There's rat poison inside.
Let's share it then.
Hey, come on, listen!.
Look here everybody.
I am not calling Ben Chow in this movie.
I am calling you guys in this cinema.
I've been through all this too.
It's so boring when you work all day long.
It's normal to have daydreams
when you're working.
As the saying goes: no daydream, no year end bonus.
So, colleagues of MicroSex Office
Bear in mind, work hard in the coming days
After daydreaming, snap out of it...and get back to work.
Get to work right now.
Good morning.
Good morning. Good morning.
Good morning.
Good morning. See you later.
Ok, no problem.
Mr. Chow, come in for the meeting.
Coming.